What Happens If I Wait Too Long To Get Counseling?
You have been thinking about getting your relationship back on track for a while. Maybe you or your partner are a little skeptical about seeing a therapist and telling them all of you personal business.
Perhaps your partner is refusing to go to counseling. This happens. It is not uncommon.
I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with close to 30 years experience.
I see similar issues with my clients who have waited to come to counseling.
**One of the similarities is that they tell me that this is their last effort.
If both partners are willing to put in the work and truly want the relationship to be successful then it will be successful. But it will take effort and energy of both partners’ parts.
Ideally, people would come to counseling when they first notice things getting off track.
**When people wait too long to get counseling it can take longer to fix their relationship than if they came earlier. Yes, you already know this, I am sure.
**So of course it can cost more money and take more time away from your other activities.
Most people come to therapy once a week for 2-3 months. It can take longer when a couple postpones seeking professional support.
**Waiting too long can also increase the risk of one of the partners mentally checking out of the relationship. The one who checked out often reports feeling hopeless and therefore may not be fully invested in therapy.
Relationship counseling requires a willingness to be open and honest. Sometimes when a couple waits too long, one partner is not willing to be honest because they do not want to hurt their spouse’s feelings by telling them they are no longer invested in the relationship.
**I have seen one member of the couple having secretly already contacted an attorney in some cases.
Of course this can come as a shock to the other person and often a VERY costly shock as retaining an attorney costs thousands of dollars.
**Putting off counseling can also make your problems get worse and resentment can build up. Resentment is an instant intimacy killer and messes things up in the bedroom.
Coming to therapy sooner rather than later can make it easier to work things out.
At Real Life Solutions Counseling, Inc., you will learn tools and techniques on how to increase communication skills and rebuild trust as well.
You can get the spark back in your relationship and feel as excited about your partner as you did in the beginning of the relationship. Yes, this can and does happen. (See my blog about getting the spark back in a relationship.)
Are you wondering if it is a good time to start counseling?
Call me, let’s chat.
Laurie Shoats L.M.F.T. (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist)
Real Life Solutions Counseling, Inc
Serving Parkland, Coral Springs, Coconut Creek, Boca Raton, Margate and surrounding areas