Can a couple get past infidelity? Yes! It is possible! It takes work but it is possible for a couple to heal from an affair. It will take a lot of courage, character and the willingness of that partner who committed the adultery to take an honest self-inventory. After taking the self-inventory, that person needs to be willing to make some changes in an effort to engage in self-improvement.
Another important factor is having that partner who committed the adultery show that they are genuinely remorseful. This is a key component in the recovery process. Without genuine remorse, the forgiveness cannot truly occur.
The person who did not commit the adultery needs to be willing to genuinely forgive their partner once remorse and self-improvement have taken place. Trust will need to be rebuilt from the ground up. Once it has been put behind them it is detrimental to a marriage to throw it in the other persons face or even bring at up at all. The affair needs to be put to rest and resurrecting it even while arguing, will only bring it back to life.
This takes time and a lot of support and guidance. It the couple is willing to invest in their relationship and do whatever it takes to recover from an affair, then the relationship awaiting them on the other side of this process can be even more rewarding!
If the couple decides not to salvage their relationship, then support will be needed as well as mourning the loss of the relationship. Guidance and education is especially needed if there are children involved to prevent long-term issues.
Infidelity is a symptom of the problem. It is a byproduct of the struggles of a relationship, which can be repaired!
I have helped hundreds of couples develop clarity and insight regarding adultery and trust.
Call me. Let’s chat!
Laurie Shoats LMFT
Real Life Solutions Counseling, Inc.